The Square Life

I will start by saying there is something special about taking a date to a campfire. It’s not that any flaws your date may have are hidden in the surrounding darkness, nor is it that the odor of heavy perfume is swept away by the ensuing smoke (although those are two extra perks); it’s just a good way to get to know someone in a relaxed, comfortable, environment.

I do not hope to dedicate this entire article to the traditional joys of summer campfires. You have already sung the songs, carved on trees, and made S’mores until your fingers are raw from licking off the sticky mallows. The duty has fallen on me to introduce you to the best way to entertain and feed your date while campfiring: Woofums (or Shnarfums as they are also called).

These tasty treats are fun and easy to make and a great way to show your date you really stand out from the S’more-eating crowd. Just find a stump and let me guide you through 3 easy steps to the Wonderful World of Woofums.

Making Woofum sticks are easy! If you have a hotdog/marshmallow roaster you can just poke it into the wider end of a medium sized cork (available at any craft store.) Or for all you craftsmen you can make a really nice one that will last you date after date by purchasing a wooden dowel that is approximately 1” in diameter. Saw the dowel into two pieces. (4” long for the handle and 2” long for the roasting end.) Drill a hole into one end of each dowel. Purchase a rod that will fit into each drilled hole (these materials can be purchased at any hardware store.)

Now that you have the stick, it’s time to make some Woofums! Start by getting a can of your favorite biscuits or rolls (Pillsbury or Generic are good.) Spray the roasting end of your Woofum stick with butter spray. Cover the roasting end with dough. Hang over fire or coals as you would with a marshmallow. Do not start it on fire, because your instincts will tell you to wave it in the air, and there is a possibility that you hit your date with a flaming ball of dough. This is a bad thing. Once golden brown remove from heat and take Woofum from dowel. Careful, it’s HOT!

Now it’s time for the best part—The Fillings. You can fill a Woofum with whatever you want. Be creative! Some fillings could be: Marshmallows, Jam, Honey Butter, Pudding, Whipped Cream, Strawberries, Powdered Sugar, Sliced Apples, Pie Fillings, Cinnamon and Sugar, Ham and Cheese, etc…make it dinner or dessert! Any of these fillings can be easily moved from your kitchen to the fire pit with the use of some simple Tupperware.